lost.

i am lost. i do not know what im doing, everyday Just passes like that, like very meaningless. i do not know what i want to be in the future, i am so aimless. every once in a while i just feel like want to shut myself in a room and cry myself out, i do not know what and why im crying for, but i just want to cry, guess it's hormone's fault. i admire those who have everything planned in their lives, all they have to do is just follow exactly to the plan. but it might be a little boring you know, when u have everything planned, but what i envy about them is that they knew exactly who they are, and what they wanted to be in the future. people thought im on way to my dream destination, but here i am, wandering and lost on the streets. I do know one thing though, the fact that i want to get out of this fucking school as soon as possible. I hate this place, like every inches of it, and it sucks to the max. i just want to get the hell out of this place asap. There's nothing im gonna miss about this school. its kinda depressing when you see people keep on studying, like their eyes are literally few cm away from the books, the more i look at them, the more depressed i get. Not trying to say that study is a fault, but i just don't like the fact that people are trying so hard, but im doing nothing except giggling and keep on talking nonsense there. How i wish i was blind and deaf at the same time, it's good not to see this and hear all the harsh comments from others. I mighy seem a bit lost, but i do know life isn't about books, it's about how you appreciate things with your own heart, it's all about giving not about merely taking, Life should be more beautiful, and to fill your lives with all studies, thats too pathetic. so in the end, i guess im not that lost at all, well maybe, i guess.