dogs sure are noisy when they don't stop barking. :o
so please i beg you, would you stop barking for a while?
you're making my head dizzy. o.O

dear Santa...

dear Santa,

hi! err..shall i say "hohoho, Merry Christmas!" instead of saying hi?. LOL. by the way, this is my first time ever i wrote a letter for Santa. =) I got this idea from Phineas and Ferb Christmas Special, in which the kids wrote a letter to Santa. so i found this was quite interesting, and i decided to write a letter to Santa, too. Hopefully he will receive this letter. This post was supposed to be posted by yesterday, but due to some personal reason, so i delayed it. By the way, yesterday's weather was superb! it was sunny all the day, and it was fabulous. So i guess, this is a present from Santa, perhaps. =) err, this is my first time ever doing this, so i don't know what to say. =) let's talk about my Christmas wishes. there were 3 wishes for christmas, but i won't say it out loud here =D
so, i will secretly tell Santa what my wishes are, and hopefully my wishes will be granted by next year. =))) teehee, thanks, Santa.=D and lastly, Merry Christmas!メリークリスマス!!! =D

From: absolute-kind-and-obedient-Me =D

can't stop loving you

well i guess i'm kinda exaggerate the whole thing on the previous post.
but still i'm not in such a good mood now
i guess this happens every time when i finished a particular anime. urgh..i feel so stupid over this. well, i guess i am stupid.==
err... by the way i've started watching katekyo hitman reborn, and i almost laugh my arse of.c: hahahahah. can't help being this way, the anime is too funny. i prefer action + comedy + romance anime. hahaha.this explains why i don't watch the romance anime, but la corda d'oro is exceptional. xD you can say i'm boyish or whatever. i don't really care, just wanted to be the one i wanted to be. haha.but i still couldn't help myself from thinking some stupid sad things..oh, somebody please help me get out of this. i don't wanna end up my life like this, it's too sad and unacceptable TT

trust you.

i'll be happy if someone says : i trust you.
hehehe.
erm, i've changed my blog's song.
this song, has been my fav for years.
err, i was quite surprise that i never get sick of this song.
coz usually, i don't listen a same song again and again, but this song is exceptional.
well, maybe i'm fond of this song, this is the only explanation i could think of.
been sticking my eyes to the television for almost three days like that?
keep watching my fav anime.
well, i never thought this anime is so thrilling.
but it's kinda sad though, some of my character died. TT
i cried, though.
it's like watching someone you loved so much die in front of you.
omg, my eyes are brimmed with tears again.
luckily there's no people in the house, except the little turtle. i wouldn't mind him see me cry, it's ok after all to reveal my weak spot in front of him instead of my family
i'd rather die then. i hate people see me cry.
i guess i'm back to my old self again.why? no reason. i've been stuck in my own world, and keep imagine something that would never come true. i guess this is painful. knowing that you can't have the one you loved. and again, this is making my tears falling down.
TT. urgh. i hate this feeling.
i'll just watch some comedy to got rid of this stupid retarded feeling.
bye peeps.

i wonder does eating lots of pineapple makes you fart?
coz i've been farting a lot since yesterday xD

crazy for Hawaii five-o

i'm in such a desperate to watch the new Hawaii five-o
perhaps it's new so it's hard to find in the web.
and mostly, it's licensed. i was like what the heck. =.=
so i search on some of the chinese website, and i did found some, but only episode 6 and episode 8.even worse, the connection was hell slow. it made me wanna crush everything into pieces,seriously. coz i wanted to watch this series so badly. hmm..and waiting is pretty much tiring..so i decided to search for it in the AXN Asia official website, and it had my jaw drops until the ground. 07.25am in the morning? you gotta be kidding me, i'm still snoring in my bed room. geez! how am i suppose to watch it???? =((( there's no alternative ways already. or maybe i shall search for the dvd at Speedy..but don't think there's one. so it didn't help much i guess.LOL.so, i guess i'm gonna watch the rerun on AXN channel. 11.45 pm, and 0310am until 6am in the next morning. well, you'll see a panda in Malaysia tml,and that panda happens to be me xD you can call me crazy or whatever.. coz i admit that i'm crazy. =D now listening to BETH, the best song ever, well, i love the Puckerman version one. hahha,never sick of it. xD
by the way, need to drink coffee later, it would help me to stay awake for the whole day. teehee..oh, the turtle is crawling crazily in the little plastic box again, and it kinda annoys me.LOL, dun worry, i dun kill turtle. but, the food is going to run out soon, guess i will have to visit the store in no time..and replacing the water for the cute adorable little turtle had been a torture for me. THE WATER STINK! LOL..i almost puke when i smell it. LOL. KELLY CHONG YI YING faster comeback and take your turtle back! LOL. and i dun know what happen to this stupid retarded mozilla firefox, it just won't work the way it used to be. shit! and again, my mom is yelling at the kitchen ~AND as always, i'm the target. since the holidays kick off, she's always said "brat, you better get your room clean up!" "brat,clean up your study desk now, i dun wan to see a single dirt or dusk on it, or else, you're doomed!" "you this noxious little brat, better get your hair cut,before i do it on my own, you don't want to see me ruin your hair don't you?" oh geez, that's why i said i din get to enjoy the holidays. =((( LOL. but it was kinda funny to see my mom talking to me that way, and i never scare of you xD mom, i'll wait till you drag me to the salon and only then i'll get my hair cut, so no worries. but since when i've become a brat? LOL, but i won't say that i never are a brat xD ok, this post is too long dy,i will end here then. need to prepare coffee first..bye bye peeps xD

bragging, whatever...

11 days left before CHRISTMAS truly arrive =D
i found myself stupid to feel this way, i mean i didn't get to celebrate Christmas. but i do like Christmas though. it's my second favourite day, and with no doubt, CHINESE NEW YEAR dominates the first place. =D
So i read the freak guy's blog, i found him as a crazy, no doubt a full time freak and somehow a noxious kind of guy. haha, no offense, i'm just spoke out the fact. but somehow, i couldn't agree more with what he had said. but i don't like the way he talk, always bragging about his F****** S*****. can't exactly tell you what is it, it will be so obvious that i'm talking about this guy, and then I WILL BECOME SO BUSTED. LOL, Candace favourite quote, which is also my fav quote now. =D
watching hawaii five-o now, OMG, i never thought it would be so great that i couldn't take my eyes off it.
oh, it's so sad to say that i've only watched the 1st episode of Glee season 2. how sad, i'm waiting for the whole season to end and i'm gonna watch it all at once. =D crazy,eh? this is who i am. A FULL TIME DRAMA CHASER xD and i'm proud to be one.hehehe. Seriously there's a song called F YOU? and it was sung by Cee Lo Green. LOL, maybe i should sing this in front of those mean girls. but i won't do it, it will only bring down my reputation. and plus, i'm not the rebellious kind of girl xD in fact,i'm LOL, it just that i'm shy to bring this idea out.hahaha.
holidays gonna end soon, you gonna see me crying like a baby who isn't weaning and still ask for mama's breast milk xD hahahhaha... LOL, sorry if i'm being abit rude xD lolx.

again and again...

again, there is another girl commit suicide in china.
and again, the reason is LOVE.
i watched the video which shared by others in facebook.
and i did witness the girl jumped off the building,in the video.
I SWEAR THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I EVER SEE THIS. (though it's not on the spot)
but this is enough to make me have nightmare tonight, or worse, everyday onwards.
by the way, i'm so confused now..
i don't know whether the path i chose is the right one or not.
but i'll continue walk on even if it takes my life time to achieve it.
='D
ehh, i want to watch THE SOCIAL NETWORK! LOL. it would be better if i watch it in the cinema.PERFECT. =D

OMG

after trapping myself in the toilet for such a long time
my butt hurt so much =.=
and now i knew the consequences for not consume vegetables and fruits in my daily diet
duhh..=.= haha
i was so regret for drinking coffee last night, and i can't sleep :O
but thanks for that, i managed to play HARVEST MOON until midnight and i've earned a few bucks from the shipping hehe, and one more thing i've renovated my house xD LOL so far, i've found 40 harvest sprites, still a long way to go until the harvest goddess awake.

then, i remember i had a nightmare, in which i wish i will never ever been through that kind of situation in reality.
it was all about YOU, the jerk i hated the most in my entire life. well, in that dream, i encountered with you, and i'm supposed to walk by you in reality, coz i hate you so much that i will never wanted to see you (even if it's just one blink)...instead i greeted you and smiled to you in that dream. well, that's enough to make me puke all over my bed, but luckily i didn't puke.or else i'm gonna wash my bed sheet today.
and as expected, you did something to me in the dream, exactly what you did to me last time. haha, like something you would did when you have nothing to do. =.= it's kinda stupid to have you in my dream last night, i wonder why i didn;t slap you, like what had shown in the television screen..LOL, i will laugh till the day i die if i really did it..hahahaa

ok,that's all for today... gtg go now...=D by peeps, stay-tuned =DDDD
*this kind of ending is kinda awkward isn't it? LOL

i had a crush on Bruno Mars =P
hahaha
he's cool

love your life.

err..
recently there were lots of people sharing the same link stories.
and it was a guy who commit suicide because of love.
he jumped from his house, a condo i guess, which was 14 floors high.
and he died.
i'm not going to critic his act, he's dead. let's respect him i mean.

Teens, or anybody who's reading my post.
please always remember that you love your life as much as you love yourself.
life is precious. and there's nothing like 'TAKE TWO' in your life.
live your life to the fullest, and when you die, you have no regrets.
die might be easy, but think of your parents and friends first.
9 months of pregnancy,and it's not easy you know, and you're like go away without saying goodbye. sigh....
so peeps, LOVE YOUR LIFE.
that's all i wanna say...

glitter-graphics.com

what a suckish day =.=
it's better i don't go out and stay at home better
what use for going out?
always getting scold by someone
shit =.=
when i say i don't want go out
don't give me the stupid damn look
it's really tired to interact with someone like you
barbarian


and speaking of which
i think i've spoken too much
sorry, can't control myself for being this way
am just too angry already
don't push me to the limit
coz i don't know what will i do
don't make me sabotage or scold those rude words
i will tolerate with you for the time being
and it doesn't mean that you can do whatever you want to me
get it?
argh, what a shit day!

lame post.

hi peeps!
it's been a long time since my last post.
teehee..
argh, only a few weeks left before the school reopens.
kinda sad though.. =.=
alone in the house now
others went out to have some fun dy..
hahah, dun feel like going out and have fun so i stay at home instead..
i guess i won't be able to watch Rapunzel dy
nevermind then, i'll buy the blue-ray and watch it whenever i want,wakakakak.
ok, lately, i've been so crazy and madly in love with S.M The Ballad..
i wish i could buy the album!
mom, faster come back la.
i'm so hungry ady, hopefully there's my fav sweet and sour pork ribs heheheheh
omg~ =DDD

越来越讨厌你

ok..
my life is completely a mess lately.
first, i wouldn't and couldn't sleep if the time is not around 11.00++ pm.
second, there are still tons of homework to be completed.
third, i don't know why but i just feel gloomy all the day.

btw.
i managed to finish new moon few days ago.
funny right?
i bought the book like..err months ago, i guess, 'months' is inappropriate. but whatever, as long as you understand.
and only a few weeks ago i managed to finish it.
haha. i was sort of regret for selling the ECLIPSE to my friend, i thought i wouldn't be reading it anymore, so i sold it to my friend. but then, i was completely wrong. the story enthralled me! and i couldn't stop reading it. only that it was quite boring in new moon because EDWARD was gone and Bella been through some hard times. it was quite devastating though.haha. i want to watch the movie, but i'll only do that i finished eclipse, only few pages to go! yay =DD
and also, PHINEAS AND FERB lights up my day =DD
haha, it would be better if ferb could talk more.hehe, but he's cool...hehehe
oh, i read the newspaper this morning, there's a news completely shock me. a guy died because he drank too much carbonated drink. what the hell, maybe i should change my diet dy. you know, pepsi is always my fav whenever i go somewhere else. like in the cinema, or fastfood restaurant. no other options. =.=

ok, will stop writing here. need to finish my assignment first.

p/s: a few days ago, something weird happened. i remember it was about the time to go to sleep, and i yawned. then i found that my eyes were brimmed with tears, and the tears rolled down on its own. it's like i'm crying. weird huh..hmm...

never feel this nervous before.
err..
you'll faint after you know the reason why i feel this way.
coz....
Victoria visited nichkhun's house in Wgm today..
gosh, even me who sit in front of the computer ady feel the nervousness
and i bet Victoria is x100000000000 even nervous than me
LOL. xD
but luckily khun's family is lovely xD

i'm just an outsider...

i'm just an outsider
so i have no right to judge
but it really hurts my heart whenever i see those words.
i said : it's ok, nevermind.
but actually those words are piercing into my heart
my heart is bleeding now.
did i do the wrong thing?
or everything that i did or we did is wrong?
if i were the old me
i would definitely scold bad words here
but now i'm grown up dy
i'm not feeling angry or anything
just feeling down
...........

i'm waiting for you to tell me the whole thing
the truth.

once before...

once before,
you were my dream.

once before,
you were my world.

once before,
you were my soul.

but i never tell you this.

i have no guts to do so.

i'm afraid of losing you, i guess.

and i do regret for that. HAHA.

but then...

when i looked back at your picture.
those feelings just vanished.

i guess time really heal the wound.

4 years has passed away like nothing had happened before.

well, i was glad that i'm able to go through all of this.

i remembered.

the last time i saw you, i was deadly nervous.

i wished i'll never see you again and i thought that i still had a crush on you.

but then i realized that it wasn't that way.

i felt nervous because i haven't see you for 3 years like that.

And the sudden coincidence made me sweat like hell, and i felt like my heart is pounding out
of my chest.

of this stupid and reckless reaction, i thought i still.......well, i'm not going to say it out loud.it's totally embarassing. -.-

and by thinking of this, i laughed. i guess i'm still not mature enough to judge WHAT LOVE IS.
hmmm, and now i'm able to say that, i can live better even without you. =)

but i'm happy to know someone like you in my life.

and now you've found the one.

and i have my own path to go.

so...

it's time to say bye bye. =')

thank you for everything.

lalala...

just finished watching WE GOT MARRIED
and i was laughing like a mad lady
haha, it was really hilarious and funny
and i realized i've never been so happy from the day holidays began
well, i guess it's something good then.haha.
oh, now the television is broadcasting the closing ceremony of the Asian Game.
well, i have to say those China people are brilliant.
the closing ceremony is just fantastic. =D
ok.let's talk about my life.
lately, i've been dreaming about my future life.
i know it's stupid but i just can't stop myself from doing this. LOL.
i dreamed that i travel to Korea, to Japan.
i dreamed that i had my dream job, and i'm happy and satisfied with the work place.
one thing i did not dream about is my future husband. Haha. i don't know why i didn't dream of it.
i wonder, just what kind of people will my husband be. well, maybe i would end up being alone, but there's nothing wrong if i try to imagine it right? LOL
err...well, girls like handsome, talented and filthy rich guy. and so do i. but i'd rather choose a guy whom i'm comfortable with. =D hehe..so where are you? don't let me wait. i've been searching for you for ages already. hehehe. i sound like a whore.hahah whatever...
ok, got to go now...
have a nice day, peeps. =D

obstacles in life.

Life, always full of obstacles.
so being here, wasn't easy.
but i'm glad that i'm still alive and still fit as a fiddle.
ever since we are born
we are destined to finish this journey until the very the end
that is, the day we close our eyes eternally.

Life,
always a bumpy road to walk on.
haizz..
=(
things just getting complicated as each day gone by
i guess being a grown up is quite challenging huh
lots of things to worry

i remember i was a kid
i told my mom: " mom, i wanna be an adult as soon as i can!"
as time goes by
i do regret for saying those words.
and now my wish is : i wish i'll never grow up.
but i know i have to face this on my own
and the wish deep within my heart is never going to be come true

let's be realistic. ='(
can't help being pessimistic nowadays.
>.<''''

admit it.

sometimes, you'll have to admit that
you ain't that important at all.
well, this is the first time i ever let out my real thoughts here.
i feel like a sharp knife stab directly into my heart.
can't find any suitable words to describe it.
i won't expect anything from anybody anymore.
the more you expect, the bigger the disappointment.
that's it.
ok, now i will dig a little hole and get myself calm down.
.....

future...

i never thought that it's time for me to sit silently and think seriously about my future.
i once thought that this only happen when i am officially a grownup
and yes, i happened to be a grownup now. well, maybe half-grownup. haha. =)
future, something so close and yet so far for me.
knowing nothing about myself, and what i want to achieve it's hard for me to decide what i wanna do in the future.
seeing other people are so confident and their persistence in making their dream comes true, make me wanna cry actually. TT
my parents want me to become what they want me to become, and does that mean that i have to obey their will even if i don't want to? Dilemma. =(
especially my father, he has a really high expectation on me, which makes me even more frustrated. i couldn't bear to see the disappointment on his face, and my mother's as well.
they've always wanted me to become a doctor. and yes, i wish i could too. i mean, hey it's DOCTOR. it's a huge dream! but, could someone like me be a doctor. and knowing someone's life is depending on my hands, is eerie! what if i couldn't.....well, i mean what if.. that's why i always shut my mouth and be as quiet as possible when my parents talk about my future occupation. well, i know everything has it's own risk, but i just couldn't stop myself from thinking the bad things. but i really hope i can be a doctor. i really do. but i'm scared actually. =(((( so what should i do? maybe i should seek for a consultant service x(

p/s: dear kelly,

sorry ! i didn't reply your text last night, because i fall asleep as soon as i lied on the bed..haha, well you know nothing can stop me when it comes to SLEEP. well, we both are on the same boat. we are in the middle of the ocean. don't know where to go. hoping someone else could notice us and save us from this misery. But, i know one day we will head to the right direction and get out of this azure and yet crystal clear ocean. I KNOW WE WILL as every cloud has a silver lining. so just keep holding on, until the day comes.and by that time, we should've go on our separate ways. ='( sob...

Love,
Yun Qian.

mumbling to myself

here comes the holiday
but i end up with nothing to do
ok, maybe i will sit silently in the living room and do my homework
but i'll surrender first
i'm going crazy because of homework
but cannot blame the teacher also
next year is going to be a no-play-play-year.
that's it. it explains why all the teachers are giving us tons of homework, as if we never get sick of it.
ok gtg now..my mom is yelling at me dy xD

说到真的很气一下咯
都不知道问题出在哪里就随便乱乱骂人
难道就不可以好好讲吗？
难道和和气气这样子开口说话真的会伤到你的脑哈？
你试试看下啦 在这么多人面前被骂
你会爽吗？
每天在那边讲讲讲
鬼听得懂你说什么啦
你不懂你的麦克风是要换了哈？
这么老牙的还敢拿出来用
有钱的话好心你建个礼堂吧
礼堂这么小还请那么多人
你不觉得羞耻吗？
别的学校的礼堂这么大
唯独我们的是这样寒酸 ==
还要建个什么bengkel eletronik
都不懂哪来做什么的
摆丑脸？
你的脸又好到哪里去？
你以为全部人像你这样好命哈？
每天在办公室那边吹冷气
还要三请四请才会来
你很好意思咯
我知道论年纪，论辈分我是没有资格说你
但是
你年纪大并不代表你可以这样出言侮辱别人
有谁不想把最好的呈现给大家？
在班里面，老师一没有教书
他们都已经拼命在那边练歌了
他们的努力，我们都有眼睛见证！
所以，请你不要一句话就否定他们的努力！
kns!

笑死我 xD

今天不懂是什么日子
真的是笑到最疯的一天
不过还真的是可怜她
喂，你的耳膜还好吧？
哈哈！
都跟你说是命中注定的咯
你不信
xD
哈哈
现在想起来还真的好笑 xD

happy belated birthday....=)

time flies, don't you think so?
hehe
i searched for the oldest post just now
and only then i realized that 28/09/2008
was the first day ever i created this blog
ever since then
this has became the second home of mine
this blog has witnessed everything that happens in my life
honestly
you are the first place i ever think of
whenever something happen to me
though there aren't many who is truly interested in this
but i just wanna say
"happy belated birthday!"
sorry for forgotten the day i created you
=(
sorry xD

幸福
其实可以很简单
它可以是一个善意的微笑
也可以是一个温暖的拥抱
更可以是一个简单的问候

所以
知足常乐最重要——♥

过了就算了……

我还记得小时候
因为懒得整理书包
所以每天把全部的课本都带去学校
结果
害我上校车时还要妈妈从背后撑着书包才能够进去
不止这样
因为书包太大
校车内能够走动的空间又很小
结果我的大书包常常打到别人
所以每次进校车时
大家都尽量避开我
因为大家都不想被我的书包给打中
有一次还更惨
因为书包太重的关系
结果在下校车时因为没站稳
就在校门前跌个狗吃屎
现在想起来有够丢脸的
后来
我学聪明了
尽管我百般不愿意
我还是每天整理书包
所以
以上的情况就很少发生了
其实
人也一样
学会整理自己的心情
就会发现其实这个世界有点不一样
我试过对一件事情很执着
但后来才发现
这对大家都不好
不开心的事情
经历过久好了
不要一直摆在心底
因为这种感觉就好像
拖着一大袋的石头
那么的沉重
过了就算了
就好像我小时候
虽然不甘心、不愿意
但还是学会整理书包
所以你也要一样
整理你自己的心情
把不开心的丢掉
无聊时
偶尔想起来就好了
就好像梁文音那首歌
“哭过久好了，伤都会好的。”
所以……
请你每天都能以微笑
面对人生中的每一天
=)加油

累死...
kns，好不好被选去当SU.
最最最讨厌的工作。
好不好那个老师都没有交代清楚工作
连我自己要做什么都不知道。
显咯这些人 =(

彼女の夏

《彼女の夏》

基本上这首歌
不，应该是音乐
是我目前为止最最最喜欢的音乐
不知道为什么
听了它，心里就会很平静
然后就会莫名其妙地感到惆怅

基本上彼女的意思是“她”
有点类似代词这样子
如果是彼氏的话就是“他”

听了这首歌
感觉好像
一个人度过夏天的晚上
我也不知道怎么说
就是会有这种感觉
=D

话说
我从来没看过
一个男生留长发
也可以那么好看xD
而且是长到腰背的那种
哈哈
又来发花痴了

it's him!

nose bleed when i look at the 1st picture!
his body is just perfect! xDDD
omg!!!!!
i feel like a pervert xDDD

可能...

心情由嫌弃转为怜悯...

“坏苹果只要切掉坏掉的部分，就是还能够吃的苹果。”——摘自小孩不笨2。（略有改动）xD

可能你的本性不是坏的
只要你肯改
一切还来得及
走错路了
不可怕
可怕的是
走错路后
不懂得回头看看原来的自己

看见你一个人在班上
没有人要跟你说话
真的觉得你很可怜
然后 心里觉得也没有想象中很讨厌你了
看见你无力地趴在桌子上
我心想：老师，把他放在我们的班真的是对的选择吗？

能够帮的话我们真的很想帮
但是 如果你自己都自甘堕落的话
我们也无能为力
因为就算我们怎样劝都好
你自己还是过不了自己的那一关
而我想说的也只有那么多
希望你能够好好的反省
只要你能够好好改过自新
我们永远都不嫌迟

终于...

终于....
终于自由了！
这种感觉比吃了十杯巧克力冰淇淋还爽 xD
哈哈
不过叻
今天发生了一件事情
害我以为今天是愚人节 =='''
话说
下课时不懂从哪里来的一群人
其中一个进我们班捣乱
骂粗话就算了
还乱乱踢老师桌子
起初 心理觉得莫名其妙+生气
这些人是吃饱没事做是吗？=='''
我们哪里得罪你了？神经病
不过“好戏” 还在后头
上数学课时
我们是在电脑室上课
当我还在低头叹气数学考到那么烂的时候
学校的纪律老师就无端端进来我们的课室
后面跟着的是刚刚进来我们班捣乱的那个同学
然后纪律老师就说：
“各位，从今天起，那位就是你们班的新同学！”
我们先是“har!?”
过后，乌鸦经过，全部人都安静了。
我真的以为老师在开玩笑。天啊...
到底老师们把他安排在我们班的目的是什么？
想破头脑都想不到
唉...
明年还要多加一个
真的是灾难多多啊
看来我们班明年也别想安宁了 ==

昨天
海豚来我家
我们在房间谈了很久
笑到肚子都要爆了
女生嘛
就是改不了爱八卦的性格-------------♥
后来
她看到我床上那快要“挂”掉的psp
她问我：“这东西怎样按？”
我就说：“快要坏了，button sot sot的了。这东西不懂买几年了。”
结果海豚就说：“两年了啊。”
问号出来了，就连我这个主人都不知道买了几年的东西，而这个很少来我家的丫头竟然知道的那么清楚？搞什么啊? xD
“你怎么知道？连我都不知道叻。”我毫不犹豫地说出了口。
“你自己说的啊！”
“有咩！几时？”
“form 2的时候啊。你自己在班上跟我们说的。”
“有吗有吗？？”
“有啊，你自己说的。那时候你舅舅为了搞神秘就让你猜他要送什么给你。你自己猜不到就叫我们帮你猜咯，你还说什么即不是ipod,也不是相机什么的...我到现在还记得。”
给他怎么一说，我倒是记得了。原来我说过这样的话啊。
他没有说我到是不记得了。
这件事情真的给了我很大的启示。
有些话，也许你是不经意说出口的
但有些人真的会把这些话记在心里。
你不记得了，但是有些人还记得。
而我，就是属于这样的人，自己说过的话不记得了，别人说过的话倒是很记得。
我想每个人都是这样的吧。
因为我们都不会特别去记得自己说过什么话，所以伤了人也不知道。
这就是所谓的“讲者无心，听者有意”吧。
听的那个人都回比较敏感的
人，往往都是嘴巴比脑快
等到伤到人时才来后悔
因为这世界上最利刃的武器不是刀子
而是从你嘴巴里说出来的那一字一句。

心酸了......

常听人家说什么社会平等啊 什么尊重别人啊 什么一大堆的
但真正做到有几个？
我是个非常讨厌狗眼看人低的人， 因为我知道不被人家放在眼里、任人践踏的滋味。
问我为什么知道? 因为我本身也经历过，就这样简单。
这种滋味真的很不好受。比全身爬满蚂蚁还难受。
今天，此刻，我在面子书看到了一非常让人不忿的事情。
一个衣着不怎么样，挑着担子的老人进入到商场想帮孙女买发卡。
这时不知道从哪里来了一个良心被狗吃掉的保安人员，踢了老人一脚，大声苛责老人如果他不出去就要打他。
老人无奈地惟有默默离开商场。
眼泪也划过老人的脸颊。
想到这里，眼泪已经快要掉下来了。
不为什么，只是觉得心酸了。
试想想看，一个活到几十岁的老人
还要面临当众被羞辱的感觉
如果...
如果那个老人是你的爸爸
你又会有什么心情？
只因为他穷，他挑着担子，他就不能受到良好的对待吗？
就因为它没钱，就可以当众羞辱他吗？
无语。彻彻底底无语。原来每天挂在嘴边的社会平等是这样的。
只能感叹这个社会是现实的。
你有几个臭钱，人家就把你当神一样膜拜，每天都有数不清的哈巴狗、马屁精来为你拍马屁。
你没钱，好的吗，就不跟你混在一起。不好的吗，人家就对你冷语嘲讽，还倒回来问你：“你哪根葱啊？ ”
社会当众 会为这种事情而愤怒、落泪、不忿、心酸的人还剩多少？
你知我知就好。
那个没有良心的保安人员，我已经不知道该用什么字眼去形容你了。
真的需要这样对待一个老人吗？
我看那保安妈妈看到你这样对待一个无助的老人，我看她当场也会哭成泪人，说为什么养到这么大的儿子会是一个这么没有良心的人。
难道好言相劝是真的那么难？需要动用到暴力、大声苛责吗？
我相信如果那天是换了一个有权有势的人，你应该会恭恭敬敬的吧？
有钱，没有错；没钱，也没有错。
错的是社会，现在的社会已经是彻底的腐败了。
唉......

男生，请尊重女生。

有些男生
长得不怎么样
却很喜欢嫌弃自己的女友/别的女生长得丑
这应该算是他们的本领吧？
今天在外面听到一个男生说
“长得这样丑。”
人家长得怎样关你屁股事啊？
你知不知道这样讲是直接讲到人家父母的头上去啊？
先照照镜子吧，再看自己有没有资格说别人。
吃大便的。

screw up!

"Sis, where's my..."

" argh, shut up! screw you!"

then she walked away as soon as i shouted at her. lol, perhaps she didn't come in the right time.

argh, things got stuck in my head!! it's like ear wax accumulate in your ear, and you feel uncomfortable with it. gosh, hate this feeling!

"words i couldn't say.

are now treasured in my heart."------------------♥


thanks for being there when i need you the most.

i appreciate it.----------------------------------------♥ =))) hundreds of smileys for you ♥

you've changed.

that's all i could say today.

i wanted to be happy.

but for some reasons.

i can't.

let's get married, okay?

been addicted to this song...
'let's get married,okay?' omg, how i wish someone could tell me this right now.
EXCUSE ME, i'm not in the age of getting married..
haha, okay! i hope someone will tell me this in 10 years later..hehe.
i've been chasing ANGEL'S TEMPTATION like crazy and because of this, i haven't watch glee yet! hmm...
at the end of this drama, i ended up crying like a baby who missed her mother. LOL. but it was just sad. and the ending sucks! i thought the nurse will end up with that super duper cute adorable sexy handsome man, but you know what, THEY DIDN'T END UP TOGETHER! ohh, why the hell am i sitting in front of the computer and watching this drama for a whole day...GRRRRR...i wanna bite someone now...
oh God, please help me..i'm in the midst of laziness! LOL, please help me to get out of this, i really want to study, but my computer is trying to seduce me EVERYDAY! Ooops, should be EVERY SECOND. i just can't resist the temptation..gosh! seeing everyone is trying hard for this final exam, oh god, shame on me, i'm sitting here and blogging again! T.T i think im not going to do well in this final exam, this is what my intuition tells me! T.T
by the way, LEE SEUNG GI is cute! and im listening to his song now, his songs make me cry~ i dun noe why i cried so hard, maybe i put myself in that situation..lolx...
and the song >>> lets get married,okay makes me wanna get married now ahahahah! dun worry, i was just kidding..hehehe. still long way to go xDDD

ok gtg now..bye =DDDD ok, gonna cry hard tonight..hehe~

almost died.

guess what?
i almost died just now. xD
lolx, just kidding.
it was just that i was too exhausted that i might die..xDD hahaa.
it was fun though.
but there are times in which i wish i could shout loudly and hit myself hardly against the wall.
there's so much to do, it's like a never-ending-story. LOL. how come i feel myself are trying to make it into such a big deal.
by the way.im kinda unhappy. =(((
gotta go now..bye...

ironic.

it was ironic when you're praising someone whom you actually dislike.

LOL.

and it is more ironic when you thought of yourself when you're reading this post.

triple LOL!

shouted for help. no one cares.

i opened my eyes.
"it's another day again." i whispered.
staring at the phone's screen, it's 6.57 in the morning. Hell, why i woke up so early??
i lied on the bed. nothing to do. so i decided to surf the next using mobile web. well,i visited facebook of coz.
then something run through my head. it was the thing someone used to tell me.
"you grumbled because you wanted someone to notice you. but at the end no one cares. so what for? " it was true. no one really cares. it's like you shouted for help, but everyone just passed by and ignored you.
so i will live my life to the fullest. that's it.
and i'll say bye bye to you, hatred.
=D

yeah =D

finally glee season 2 episode 1 is out..i'm downloading it now.hehe.
can't wait to watch it. omg, it's like today is going to be the greatest day i ever had. teehee..
erm..i saw someone is going to interfere other's life again. or even worse, she's trying to seduce someone. i didn't mean it to say something like this. but, your action has proven it. So, no offense.
can you just stay quiet in your life? it's like perigi cari timba kind of girl, no self-respect. i don't know what's your next step, but i know you got some bad intentions. =(((

hesitant....

hello, peeps, sorry for leaving my blog neglected! thousands of sorry =D oh no, my mom is seducing me with the ice-cream again, gosh, it's a big temptation for me. No, you can't eat it, remember, ujian SEGAK next week! but...i wish i could eat it as much as i could xD oh no, i was selected to participate in the coming debate competition. i wish i could say " can i say 'no'?" to teacher, but before that, she cut in and say 'i knew you could do it.', oh, thanks for 'knowing' me so well == and i dun now which jerk suggested my name to teacher, if i knew it, i would slap that person in the face, and say 'mind your own business.' LOL, but maybe i was too cruel. xD

went through a stormy day about two days ago. i was a little bit emotional and moody. that kind of feeling just keep on recycling in my body, when i think i was okay, that feeling come back to strike me again. i just can't stop myself from thinking the things that keep me mad. i cried in front of my mum and thank god, she helped a lot to counsel me. thanks mom. in fact, she was more emotional than i was when she had listened to my story. LOL. when i think about it all over again, i feel stupid to cry over this small matter. let it be.. don't dwell with the past, because it makes your life harder. so i just wanna make my life simple and joyful, and i convinced myself to got rid of it. but whenever i look at you, it's getting awkward, because no matter how hard i twist my tongue, what happened is already happened. and i just cant pretend that nothing happened. i hesitated. i went through a few sleepless night, thinking about the same question. that was the darkest moment i ever had, for the time being.

oh shit, i dun noe which jerk just called in. but i didn't pick up the phone. this jerk ady called in for a few times ady since last night. == i dun noe whose number is this. shit.

ok the post will stop here.

p/s: i knew i wasn't the important one. but could you please at least treat me better.

if you have guilty conscience

dun noe what should i start with. the school day was just boring. haha.most of the malay teachers din come to school today. perhaps they still celebrating raya. xD
hmm. see the title right? this is referring to a thick-faced person. dun really like to mention her name here. but her attitude is driving me crazy and sometime, im sick of her. even with a look at her is enough to make me crazy and mad. sorry to be absurd and sarcastic, but i just hate her.
well, it all started with a function. i dun noe why she could become the leader instead of my friend. where as my friend does all the job and she only does part of the job. i guess this is the benefits of being the leader eh. and yet you didn't bring the things and stuff you are supposed to bring by today. "ooppsss....bla bla bla." i know you're trying hard to make your words convince other, but for me, it was just a bunch of shit, totally bullshit. fak off, lazy-bug. the only task you know how to do is showing off that you're going to study overseas and bla bla bla. so what? like i care. lots of people are studying overseas as well, it's not only you are able to do that. argh. shit, i really hate her.
last but not least, if you have guilty conscience, you should apologize and not walk away without any reasonable explaination. ==

what should i do?

♥

i'm so in love with super junior's kyuhyun !!! ♥

a day at friend's house.

went to kelly's house just now.
and i was late. x( sorry
there's nothing much to do, just cut and paste. and discuss about the designing as well.
HAHA. and i was the last one to go back, my mom's fault. she's owez that late.
by the way, what does 'XOXO' means? i saw this on gossip girl. and i was puzzled. haha.
=DDDDD
read someone's blog just now.
and i was quite angry though it's not my turn and i got no right to question and angry about it.
but still i feel pity for the baby. =(
everyday go out and left the child behind. you made the decision to give birth to the child, and yet you neglect him and had fun outside. is this what a mom should do? well, i'm speechless. feel guilty for the child though. i guess you're not mature enough and you still act like a teenage who wants to had fun all the day without taking consideration of the consequences. all you care is F.U.N. well, there's nothing wrong about having fun. i'm not saying that having fun is something wrong. but in this case, you are wrong! TOTALLY WRONG!!! sorry if i sound too harsh. but i can't help myself for being this way. urgh.
by the way, i haven't do my hw....

dear fairies,
pls give me some magical medicine. so that when i eat it, i can ignore my homework. teehee.
p/s: i'm dead broke now. so can you give me for free? thanks a lot =DDD

love,
QiAn. ^^

tears falling down.

oh my god!
can't stop myself from crying
sorry, dun misunderstood.
i'm not crying for someone
i'm crying for a drama.
well, it's now actually a new drama. i've watched it like 5 or 6 years ago.
and i decided to watch it all over again like 2 or 3 days ago, when i accidentally remember the title of the drama during shower.
LOL.
and i've cried for so many times. =((
it was just SAD! though i said i dun watch sad drama and this was the only exception..haha.
omg!!!!

happy birthday =))♥

i don't know whether you are going to read this or not,

but still..

happy birthday =D

love you ~ =D ♥♥♥

holidays----♥

the holidays finally arrived!!!
hahaha.
but only for one week and a day..how sad!
unlike other school, we are going to school on tuesday!
this is totally absurd!
by the way.
when the holidays come, i'm not going to laugh first and smile like a crazy person, coz i noe the bad news are still waiting for us. and finally, bad news stroke! guess what, it's HOMEWORK,again.
HOMEWORK, you are my nightmare, my fear! please go away from me. kekekekee.
not sure how am i going to spend my holidays. but probably will just go with the flow. i'm not the kind of person who would jot down and plan my schedule. coz it makes me nothing but like a robot.
hmm. am going to have a tight schedule. mostly occupy by homework. hey,you know what, thanks a lot for giving us lots of holiday assignment.==
yeah~ SM artists are going to have their tour at L.A now. hehehe.i wish i could fly to there. haha. maybe i should sneak in to the airport, and hide in a stranger's luggage, and maybe i could fly to L.A hahahah, and mission accomplished ! yeah yeah! getting more and more crazy.
hehehehe. i saw him yesterday. he looks good =D well, he looks good in every outfit. and i guess he even looks good when he's naked.=p LOL. forgive me.something wrong with my brain today...
heheheheheh.

anything, gonna list down something before i leave.

10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU:-
#why did you 'purposely' appear in front of me?
# why you have such a perfect and a cutest smile i've ever seen?
# why you have to smile all the times and you know what, it's kinda annoying.
# and i know it's weird, but i have to hate you, why did you look so alike with TOM CRUISE ?
# why did you looks so sexy and charming when you were running on the field.
..................
i'm thinking hard but i just couldn't find 10 reasons why i should hate you. in fact, i'm so deeply in love with you. ♥
oops!.. there's still one left.














# why did you snagged away my soul when i decided not to fall for you anymore? ? and yet, you didn't mean to give it back to me.♥

那一句从没对你说出口的"谢谢" ...

现在的时间是下午01.53
本想温书，但看见电脑还是不忍心亏待自己。哈哈
刚刚打开面子书，看见有人说今天会出现两个月亮。实际上那第二个的月亮是火星。
他们还说下一次看到的时候会是2287 年，也就是说 277年过后，这个现象才会再次发生。
一生人中只能看那么一次，我觉得已经很足够了。
因为轮到下一次发生的时候，我早已不在这世上了。
有些事情，就只有那么一次，包括生命。没了就是没了。
所以，我真的很想感谢你，在我短暂的生命里出现。
感谢你，让我知道，其实上学不是一件那么糟糕的事。因为至少还有你在。
感谢你，让我知道，至少你还是一个在乎我的人。
感谢你，总是在我低潮的时候，说些黄色笑话，让我笑得眼泪掉出来。
感谢你，让我知道做人其实可以不用那么执著。
感谢你，在我被老师骂得时候，帮我说那个老师的坏话。
感谢你，在我哭得时候第一个跑来安慰我。虽然最后我会哭的更惨。
感谢你， 让我知道，其实有些人不是以样貌来跟人做朋友的。
感谢你，让我在毕业时都是笑着离开。因为我知道，你不喜欢看我哭。

如果你没出现在我生命中的话。我想我现在也不会学你一样，跟别人说黄笑话说到那么开心。
你可以说是我的快乐泉源。
可是“谢谢”这两个字总是对你说不出口。因为你为我做的实在是太多了，你该得到的并不只是一句“谢谢”。
5年了。整整5年了，那一句谢谢还是没对你说出口。我真的很愧疚。

虽然上了中学四年，但总觉得小学毕业典礼仿佛昨天才举行。
如果我真的拥有哆拉A梦的时光机，我真的很想回到那一年，过着跟你一起打打笑笑的日子....然后再大大声的跟你说：“ 朋友，谢谢你。”♥

in the midst of....

i don't know what i want.
i don't know what i wish for.
i don't know why am i standing here.
and i don't know what am i searching for.

i don't know why i came to this world, but i just did.
i got friends and family i'd never wish to lose.
but somehow i still feel the emptiness within my heart.
perhaps i've been living alone for too long.
=DDDD
i need someone to lubricate my dehydrated soul xDDD sot

expecting miracles

miracles, are something i chased for in my life.
i expect it to happen every second of my life.
i used to believe in it. But...not now.
miracles could happen at anywhere,any person but not me.
because i personally dun believe in it.
trying hard not to be obsessed with it.
because i'm so afraid that i would get stuck in it.
...

exam!

omg, next week!
i can't believe that i'm still staring at the monitor and not doing my revision instead. ARGH. sorry. i just can't neglect computer in my life. it was my life partner, my soul mate, my everything! LOL.

will stop here. have to do my homework now or else. =(((
i wonder should i be a doctor in my future? well, i love to be a doctor. it just that when i'm panicking, i will start to do something wrong and even forgot what to do and what should i do. do u expect someone like me to save others life? well..but still my family, especially my parents had high expectation for me. i dun want to disappoint them. but i'm scared, honestly. what should i do now? stresss.. i wish i could be a nutritionist. but they dun seem to approve it. garh!! =((

OUTttt

~teehee~

♥it could be something simple♥

it could be something simple.
ooops. maybe it could be something abstract.
or something around us.

hmmm...
it could be the azure sky above us.
it could be the virid grass under our feet.
it could be the cold wind that whipped our face.
it could be the white snow fall from the sky.
it could be the great ocean we praised every day.
.......

or..

it could be just a cup of aromatic coffee.
it could be just a bowl of ice kacang.
it could be just a unbranded shirt.

....

or...

it could be you.♥



_happiness could be something simple_ ♥

does anyone knows when will GLEE season 2 broadcast?
i've been dying to watch this series.D:

一个人的晚餐
一个人的夜晚
一个人的星空

我...
想念你了 =D

“笑的如何灿烂，也掩饰不了心中的伤痕。”——此刻的心情。

stressssss

aren't you supposed to trust us？
aren't we are the one you should trust?

i feel neglected and yet stupid to trust someone like u.
why am i trying so hard ?
in the end i get nothing but just a bunch of F words.hell ya. =D
sorry for being rude. ==
but maybe we are nothing but just a servants for you. and yet. we didnt get our pay! oh fak off.

and u!
i'm so sick of you!
you always think you are the right one. and yet you never listen to me don't you?
you chose to be like that. and yet, you're trying to defend yourself and stop giving me the you-offended-me look.one more thing, get lost. stop saying something to get others' sympathy! you're stink！

不明白为什么你说谎

我真的不明白
为什么你对他说了谎
不只是他
甚至你周遭的人
你都对他们撒了谎，对吧？
难道你一生人都想活在谎言之中吗？
没有了谎言，你的人生就会一塌糊涂吗？
还是说你已经习惯撒谎，来博取大家的同情、可怜，甚至是关心？
你给了他希望，却狠狠地毁了它。那我还宁愿你残忍一点，不要对他那么好。
身为一个朋友。
我对你的处事态度难免会很生气。
因为你的贪婪，受伤害的是他，我的朋友。
我在面子书上那样写，是为了警惕你不要再继续骗下去了。
哪知，你还有面子来跟我说你不是。
请问这是不是叫做 “睁眼说瞎话”？
我也许该告诉他真相，但是我不忍心看到他失望的样子。
我明白这样的感受，所以我不希望我身边的任何一个人再次经历这样的痛苦。那种痛楚，一次就够了。
所以我选择自私点，让你蒙在鼓里，我也不想这样的。看着你一副想要知道秘密的表情，我真的很犹豫，“she's a liar.”这几句话，真的差一点就从我的嘴里说出来。但我又吞回去了。对不起，我做不到。只能每天祈祷你能够把眼睛睁大一点，看清她的真面目。
所以，请原谅我对你的不诚实，我只是不忍让你对她的憧憬毁于我的一字一句。真的很对不起。=(

the back-up plan

♥ the back-up plan

[ i never wish i could have you, but actually i did.]

there are times when i spend times alone.
there are times i wish i could tell you.
there are times i wish i could see the smile on your face.
there are times i wish you would know.
there are times i wish you would love me.




but dreams are still dreams.
like the bubbles in the air.
no where to go, no direction to follow.
but i will just follow the wind.
i believe it will take me somewhere else.
somewhere far away from here.
and blow away all the pain.
so that i won't desire for something
i shouldn't have. ♥

the ones who worth it.

i admit that i don't really know about it.
but from your words, your gesture and everything that comes out from your mouth.
i could sense that you are really fond of them.
i just wanna say.
though we are the best of all, but at least..we always bear in mind about what you've told us .
seriously, you are kinda annoying now.
i dun know how to say it. but this feelings just couldn't get out of my head.
whenever you appeared , i pretended to be happy. laughing. smiling .
i wanna ask.
what about our contribution?
what about the things we have sacrificed to fulfill your wish?
and what about our feelings that u never care.
to be harsh, you are so unthoughtful.
the ones who worth you to care of, is the ones who always help you through the hard times without wanting any rewards and so. the ones who always walk by your side even when it's raining. but have you ever care about it? you never, don't you.

说实话...

有些东西
并不适合挂在嘴边
因为这只会让自己更痛心
以为你会明白
所以就选择什么都不说
因为我真的以为
就算我不说什么
你也可以知道我的心情
但，是我太高估了你
也太高估了自己
结果要搞得自己遍体鳞伤
才满意地接受这答案
世界是现实的
看到的你
也是如此的现实
原以为付出就会等于收获
所以我拼命地在付出
希望有哪一天你会知道，有那么一个人是如此地在意你。
但我错了，付出多并不代表收获一定也多。
甚至，没有收获也说不定。
累了。恨了。算了。
有几次好想哭...但却欲哭无泪。
也许已经麻木了。
我不求你把我像宝贝一样捧在手心里
也不求你当我像小孩一样捧
也不求你买什么给我
但请让我知道，至少，你是在意我的。

i hate the end of something.

10 more episode, the i will finish my fav anime.
but then the feelings come to me again
it happens every time when something has come to an end.
seriously, i really hate it.
well, i know i can watch other anime for substitution but it just won't do.
nothing can replace it.
like no one can replace you.
it's kinda sad though.
but i will just deal with it.
with the help of time.
i will forget about this feeling that kept within me.
but how come i still feel sad?
as if the tears are going to fall down at anytime.
perhaps it's impossible for me to forget about it.
='( argh, gutless! i'm such a coward.

what if he knows?

i'm dead! it looks like he knew already.
so what i'm gonna do?
wish i could dig a hole and hide it inside
so afraid that he would know
so afraid to appear in front of him
so afraid of everything
='(
told myself to let you go
but never dare to do so.
just like the song " if i let you go"
this song suits me perfectly =((

有些人
不懂做什么
嘴巴就是很贱
很爱讲人
我看了都很显
也不懂这些人的嘴巴是用来做什么的？
我跟你说
你这样子做
更显得你可怜
我们没有用？
我们再没用都好，都比你们这些只说不做的人好几万倍！
看到你们我都想吐啊
以为自己很漂亮那样
拜托啦，照下镜子吧。不过我看镜子应该也会不耐你照吧~
你不犯我，我不犯你
但你惹我，十倍奉还你！
每天在那边玩玩玩
是不是十辈子都没有玩过
我看你是去救死人吧。拜托积德一点吧！不要散播不实的谣言。我的耳朵会很痛的
你们一直在那边说我们没用
我是有点生气啦
但是我比较可怜你们咯
因为你们什么都不会
只好用自己的嘴巴来证明自己的实力
所以，你们尽管说吧
这只会显得你们更无能、更可怜。
满意了吗？八婆。=D

i ain't the doll in ur hand

sometime, i wish i could just ignore it
but still, the more i deny it, the more i hate about it.
the hatred is growing even stronger.
stronger than b4.
you know what, sometime i wish i could tell you how much i hate you
compare to others, i am nothing but just a bunch a shit
and yet, i thought u would treat me differently.
fake smile, ignorance. hell ya.

it's the best day ever

"it's the best day ever~"
i just wanna sing the song right now xD
i had fun today. went to college to take scholarship~ it was fun though, but it is more fun when we're on the way coming back. Haha. because we were very frustrated as we thought we're late. but luckily, the event haven't start yet. =D yeah~
and i encountered with other friends whom i hadn't meet them for couple of years. well, perhaps 4 years? we didn't talked much though, because i didn't greet them. well, i have to be honest, i'm the kind of person who isn't good at sociable. that's why, there were people who misunderstood that i'm such an arrogant person. well, i dun noe why, perhaps it's hard for me open my mouth first. but i felt so sorry for some other friends whom i have seen but didn't greet them. SORRY xD
but still, there is a particular person whose name could not be revealed i dun want greet. well, because he hurt me once. dun misunderstood, i dun have any close relationship with that person. but still, he hurt me with his words. but it's ok now, he's studying in other school, PRIVATE SCHOOL. well, he's rich. he could afford the school fees and transportation and etc etc...
wait..why would i waste my time in front of the pc to talk about him?

about the school. i have no idea where it was located until the kind bus driver drove us there. but now, if u ask me again where the school is, sorry, i forgot. LOL. coz i've never been that area b4 =D but the school was clean and big. and the facilities were good, and it was better than my school one =DDD haha.

after the event, we had feast at the school canteen. =DDD
and i met daphne's him. but i dun dare to have a close look at him, because he will think i was a pervert.lol, plus daph will angry =DD i should've ask daph come for me hahahahhaha...=DDD

well...
just finished one my fav anime.
i've been sitting in front of the computer for hours.
and my butt hurts so much. Haha, you'll see my butt is growing bigger by tomorrow,in fact it is big now. LOL.
i thought by watching anime, could help to distract myself from thinking of u.
but still, it does not work.
my mum asked me to have our breakfast outside this morning, and i refused.
i'm afriad to step outside of the house, even a single step.
coz i will start thinking this and that again.
i'd rather spent my time at home, numb myself with the animes.
but it ends up with me missing him more.
well, after i finished the anime, i suddenly had a thought
"ah...so it's over, the story stops here. kinda sad though." and i had a desire that the story could go on and on and on.
but things just don't turn out the way we want, isn't it. we can't control everything in our lives.
but still , we desire something.
" how i wish he/she is mine."
"ohh, i wish i could have that thing." bla bla bla.
humans are imperfect, that's why they could do everything just to get the things they wanted. Betrayal, humiliation, killing, accusation ..bla bla bla. and life's a junk.
and you know, of all the things human desire, Love is included.
we need love, it is something we can't deny.
we need to be loved, to be cared.
this is humans.
and you know what?... i need you D:
='( it's a pain when u love somebody who didn't love you back.

i admit that i'm not good at pretending.
when i wanted something so badly, i just showed it.
and it is so obvious that u could know what i'm thinking with only one look at me.
but this is also what i wish i could get rid of.
but you know what, my heart doesn't allow me to do so.
='((( heartache.
perhaps i am a poor liar.

i don't know...

i don't know what should i say.
i don't know what should i do.
i don't know how should i react.
i don't know i don't know i don't know.
ady at my wit's end.
never knew things will turn out this way.
and never knew i would fall for you.
but i'm just uncertain about this feeling.
my hands were sweating.
my head felt dizzy, as if the world was spinning on its own.
wanna shook you out of my head but i just can't.
the more i try to deny it, the more obvious that i really fall for you.
but i'm trying my best to neglect it.
or else, i can't get myself out of this. it hurts so much when u were crying alone in the night. for someone who didn't even acknowledge you. it's like a knife stabs into your heart. u groan in pain but no one knows about it.
you deserve someone better, i ain't the one. we are not compatible, and you din even know this, don't you. this is irony.
i'm saying this not bcoz i want you to know.
this is a promise to myself.
i'm not myself with you around me.
i just wanted to be myself, the original me, who doesn't care about others, who always wants to laugh when she wants to, this is me, myself. and now i'm no longer myself anymore, i'm greedy coz i wanted someone who doesn't belongs to me.this isn't me.so im searching for the best way to ignore this. but i don't know how to face you anymore. someone like me is not worth to be loved.


='(

no matter how hard i try

but still i'm very easy overlooked =((

无奈

有时候．．．
有些事情．．．

想说别在意了
但是
有时候真的不由得你这么说

想说不管了
但是
心里还是放不下那个包袱

想说不生气了
但是
心里的伤痕还未痊愈

想说忘记了
但是
心里还是惦记着你的笑容

想说放弃了
但是
心里还是有点一丝丝的苦涩

=((

get off, mean girl.

today was supposed to be fun, but a mean girl spoiled my mood.
well, as stated above, she is just a mean + arrogant + exaggerated girl.
i don't know where the hell did she get the courage to annoy me.
i think she wanted to die so badly.
but pls dun try to agitate me, i dont know what am i going to do if i lost my control.
and lastly.
get off, pathetic bean sprout.

uncertain...

ok, call me a black girl now, coz i really am!
so regret for not putting on my cap, and not applying sun block and whatsoever..
TT BLACK BLACK BLACK. ARGH
i wish i could the time is reversible ! TT
but all the matches for today are kinda exciting though. =D
we all shouted for our own team xD
hahhahaha
and a girl whose name could not be revealed shout like a crazy girl, well crazier than me.
"xxx, saranghae." LOL, which made me burst into laughter. haha.
i cheered for him too. HAHA.. =DD
yay~

cold!

the rain started in the morning, and until now, it still drizzling..
i felt that as if my legs are freezing, it's too cold. i love this though, haha, better than standing under the blazing sun xD hahahahaha
finally, tml is our school's sport day.
i was planning not go to school, but tons of books are waiting for us to 'process'. what can i do? i happened to be one of the spbt members xD
LOL.
anyway, we had lots of fun during the english period, but too bad, we had only single period for today. LOL, we played games! like humpty dumpty, and tugs of war LOLX!
the tugs of war was the funniest one, i couldn't stop myself from laughing..haha, maybe because of the posture, expression and something LOL. my stomach hurts! haha, i wished we could play it some more xDDDD

untitled

i don't know what should i put the title for this post, so i just put it as 'untitled'.
LOL, i slept at 8pm last night, could you imagine how tired i am? haha.
and i just woke up xD
this week is our school's sport days~ kinda anticipate of it xD
haha...LOL, gonna cheer for my team even though i was working with pbsm LOL ,haha, but no offense, i just wan them to win xD
ok will off now...xD still got other stuffs to do. =CCC

_english in camp_

just got back from the camp. you know what? i swear i never want to be a facilitator anymore!
it was tiring, torturing..bla bla bla. i sweat like i was taking shower. =.= could u imagine how hot it was? though it was raining, but it didn't help at all, the water vapour in the air made my hands and face sticky! ewww.. how i wish i could dash to home and take a shower. xD LOL, but the teachers don't allowed us to go back during the lunch break. and i swear i could smell something stink, it just hard to describe. there's a girl i wanted to scold so much during the telematch. =.= but i don't want to cause any mess. so i ignored her..and at the time i reach home, i finally know what " home sweet home" means. LOL. i love my home xD ok, the post will end here, bye, still got other stuff to do xD

one day you will..

i know how you feel.
when you work harder than others
but what you get back is less than others.
well, i used to be one of the people who think this way.
no matter how hard i try.
things just don't turn out the way i want.
"ah..let it be." i said that to myself. ready to accept the fact that i was born to be a loser.
but someone told me that : each one of us is a winner ever since we were born to this world.
i lifted my eyebrow. not knowing what's the meaning behind the sentence.
"i'm sure everyone knows how a zygote is formed right?" she asked.
some nodded, but some just shook their head, they don't know what is zygote.
she continued, "well, you know why? when a sperm fuse with the ovum at the fallopian tube, a zygote is formed. and from the thousand of sperm, only one sperm can fuse with the ovum. and that's how you come from, from the sperm which successfully fused with the ovum. so, no one of us is born to be a loser." she said.
and i remembered what she said, until now. it's been a year already.
so what if others look down at you? prove it they are wrong.
it's never too late to give it a try. well, you know what, i used to be teased by some silly brats when i was in kindergarten. i still remember the two brats until know. but their name will never be revealed due to privacy. LOL. they teased me because my handwriting was ugly.and plus my writing speed was slow like a crawling snail. well, i never know why i care so much about them at that time, well, kids' stuffs.LOL. some asked me why are you doing so good etc etc. but there's a secret they never know. they never knew i used to be the last in kindergarten. the exam doesn't was just something i wan to avoid when i was small. i work hard because i don't wanna get teased by others. if u see it from others perspective..sometimes, all those negative opinions or comments can make us grow stronger. just don't avoid it,because it makes u even weaker. =D

here's a song dedicated for you. also sang by my fav band -- Lady Antebellum.
their songs have motivation. =) so that's why they are on the top of my fav idol list =D
the song is called one day you will. hope you enjoy it. never lost your hope is the key to success. and also don't build castle in the air, actions must be taken. =D

one day you will-Lady Antebellum

You feel like you're falling backwards
Like you're slippin' through the cracks
Like no one would even notice
If you left this town and never came back
You walk outside and all you see is rain
You look inside and all you feel is pain
And you can't see it now

[Chorus]
But down the road the sun is shining
In every cloud there's a silver lining
Just keep holding on (just keep holding on)
And every heartache makes you stronger
But it won't be much longer
You'll find love, you'll find peace
And the you you're meant to be
I know right now that's not the way you feel
But one day you will

You wake up every morning and ask yourself
What am I doing here anyway
With the weight of all those disappointments
Whispering in your ear
You're just barely hanging by a thread
You wanna scream but you're down to your last breath
And you don't know it yet

[Repeat Chorus]

Find the strength to rise above
You will
Find just what you're made of, you're made of

[Repeat Chorus]

One day you will
Oh one day you will

please smile more than grumble

isn't it is more easy when we smile more than grumble?
so please smile, through the rain and sun.
may the smile bring your happiness. =D

_______________________________________________________________

i looked into the mirror. surprised. greasy hair, oily face, eyes with dark circles. that's me. i looked completely like a beggar, except my shirt wasn't torn. recently, i've got my fingers in all the pies. so there's no time for me to care for my appearance, not even for a second, that would kill me. well,no need to mention homework is the main cause. but other activities as well. but that's fine. at least that will prevent me from sitting in front of the computer for hours. anyway, i will be away for a whole day on this Sat. our school's english camp will be held on that day. well, our class happened to be the facilitator, so we had no choice but to attend it if we don't want to cause any mess. today was totally a fun day, joking around with friends is something i wished i could do everyday, though we might walk on different path someday. let us cherish the day from now on.

ever since i know how to count from 1 to 50, a question bothered me since then. why do humans exist? why. what if there is no creature in mother earth? what if..... well, if human doesn't exists, i guess i won't be able to joke around like this. so i've decided to ignore it. instead of thinking something that could not be resolved, why don't think a way to lead my life in a better way? it should be interesting though. never dare to imagine how my future would like. what i care is NOW. At least, i'm real. i existed. i'm tiring of pretending. i just wanted to be myself, the REAL me. so i will smile.though it can't help you to solve the problem.but at least you will feel better. at least you will know you ain't the unluckiest one. =D so SMILE, for yourself.

lady Antebellum

currently addicted to lady Antebellum's songs.
it can't be denied that their songs are heart-warming. touching and nice to listen!

Need you now, never alone, one day you will are my fav!
listen the song makes me grow stronger =D

坐在电脑面前

头很痛

脑充血吗？

life is fragile....

life is fragile.

like a glass

it can break anytime.

so

please hold it tight

don't let it break

like the way you break my heart

not in the mood to talk now.
i don't know why but something just got on my nerves.
unexplainable. i feel like i just shout it out loud.
i'm stuck. oh, whatever.
i should bang myself against the wall, oh well, GOOD!
talk about my life.it's all a mess.Yeah~
should consult a doctor. maybe something wrong with nerves or hormones or whatsoever i don't care.
well, you know, some people don't seem to appreciate you. so why should you contribute yourself to them?
some people don't really care about you.so why should you care about them?
SHITE!
my words are kinda offensive, don't blame me..my fingers follow what my brain ask them to.
=P
anyway..will be busy for this weekend.and as well as next weekend..
don't ask me what im busy with.
why cant i have a normal weekend like other people do
or else i almost become one of the pandas' sibling. LOL. you can find me in the zoo then.. LOL

[you & me]

personally, i didn't take it seriously for who i am recently.
the day just passed like it always did.
and without me knowing it, 6 months just gone away like that.
it was really fast then.
perhaps i was contented with myself lately so i never realise it.
until i asked my friend, " what day is it today?"
"5/07, and it's monday." she snapped.
i was like "oh! so it's July already."it was like someone slap me heavily in the face.
being a 16-year-old girl. i lead my life as what the other girls did.
so i think it was something usual that i can lead my life like this, without any changes.
i seriously really think of something like that. LOL
i am just a girl next door. but don't really talk too much in front of the strangers. it's kinda awkward, don't you think so.
i am the kind of person who would break her nose even when she falls backward, in another word, unlucky.
but i was lucky to have a group of friends who would always cheers for me. =D it was something i should really proud of, isn't it? though conflicts just keep on happen, but the it was something we should really need to go through.

but compare to others, i am just a tiny person who is easily over-looked, like the LUCY BECK in the novel.not only appearance, but other aspects as well. but,you..you are the person who would attract people when you do something silly. the person who would even make people anxious when you got a small cut on your finger.

=(( the post will end here. off to do my homework.bye peeps

"i cried, and no one knows about it.i just wan to keep it as a secret."

have you ever undergo something like this?
when you're really mad about something
but you just don't wanna show it..
afraid of hurting someone you really care.
well..
i've cried some many times, in which no one knows about it..
it really hurts so much..
but as each passes by..
you will start to forget about it..
as years gone by..
you will say: i feel so stupid for crying alone in the night.
it's right..
is there any need to make it so complicated?
you say it's for our sake.
but i don't really see it's good for us..
you said we don't understand you..but have you ever let us to know what's in your mind.
pls, we are not good at guessing about what you're thinking..
it's really tired.
i ever did this..i don't know why i did this. i just feel like i wan to catch everybody's attention. but it turned out to be soooo bad.
waiting there and praying for someone to go and comfort you is something useless,well for me it's useless..unless that particular person is sensitive enough to know what's going on you. but so far, i've never meet someone like this, except me..well, i have to say i am good at observing people.
but sometime, people just don't accept me to go inside their heart and see what's going on..so, i give up..instead of hurting myself like this,and act like a busy body whore, i just ignore what happens. so, don't blame anybody for not understanding you and sooo on. End.

[stop barking like a dog]

"you are very lucky coz i am so lenient to you!"
me: you said this because you are lazy to care about us.

"you have to inform me if you can't enter the class,you can't just go like that."
me: what!? do i need to inform you when i need to pee?

"you didn't attend the class three times in a row!"
me: so what? you always cancel the class last minute.

"i am very thankful to those who are very committed."
me:duh,so putting on a show. i almost throw up.

hahahahahah xD i wish i could said this loudly, just in front of you.
you know what, you are such a good actor, but i feel disgusted.
the lousiest person i ever met. i think you can be a champion of story telling competition. who asks u always tell your own stories in the class. we are not interested at all. but we have to pretend that we like it. last but not least, i hate to see your nostrils close and open whenever you start to talk. it offends me, honestly. End!

[..dehydration?LOL]

am i gonna die from dehydration? LOL i am soooo thirsty right now LOL, but don't feel like want to drink anything..just back from school..argh...tired + frustrated + depressed + exasperated !
stay on for three days continuously~ TT..and the weather is killing me..when it is hot, you feel like you can fried an egg already,no jokes! and when it turns cold, you feel like you travel to north pole. argh...but i prefer cold weather..i dislike hot day. i get offended easily when the day is humid.

argh! i should do it better..but it already happened so nothing can be done to change it..just accept the fate is what i can do...i want to learn to piano~ but since i already learned violin (though i learn myself) but probably my mom would just ignore my suggestion..what? since when i'm interested in piano..LOL, ya lor, since when? haha..perhaps i get addicted to piano ever since i watch Naruto for the second times just a few weeks ago...i like the insert song displayed in the show when Naruto is feeling sorrow and sad. well, the piece really caught my heart.and i want to learn to play that piece..haha..but i know it's impossible..i don't even know how to read the music sheets..haha, probably this is just a dream that will never come true..so i will just keep it in my mind~ and one day if i have kids i wanna sent my kids for the musical lesson xD LOL, if they are interested to learn. =D lolx, then i can ask my kids to teach me LOL~~~

hey! okay..will stop now...still got some homework haven't done! i wanna do my best in the next exam..:P

[不管了...]

以前
生气的时候
都会常常来这里发泄

现在
不管了
生气又怎样？
不能解决事情
又 伤身
与其生气
不如不管吧

时间过久了
就会淡忘一切
对你
对我
都好

不是选择放弃
只是选择忘记
忘记这一切
才能够做回自己...

wgm

watching wgm (we got married) now =D
nichkhun !! here i come xDD

[maid? LOL]

Saturday, what a wonderful Saturday we had xD it was fun though.
we work at the koperasi.checking stocks, cleaning and so on...
haha, maybe you'll ask, what so fun? but you'll know how pleasant it was when you're working with my boisterous friends xD..hahaha..all sorts of jokes come out,when we were working in the store, though it was humid and temperate. there was no fan inside the room..so we were sweating like we're just back from running. LOL, then we started to talk about the past.all the silly things we've done. like performing in front of the audience,it was really embarassing then..but then it was convivial~ LOL..
ok, the post will end here..BB =D off to watch invincible youth LOL

[change]

"don't be afraid to change.."
"you have to change.."
the phrases people use the most.
talking of 'change'. what's in your mind?
to be honest to tell, i hate to change. i'll be the original me as far as i could.
it might be good, or another way, bad. things didn't work out the way we want. like relationship, some relationship didn't work out. we cried, we grieved.nothing can be done to save this relationship.let it gone by, our lives must go on.

speaking of change...it reminds of some people i know..i used to think that, changing isn't a bad thing. but when you grown up, it brings effects, not only to that particular person, but also those around that person. some people change coz they want to accommodate and get adapted with the surroundings. sometimes, bleak conditions force people to change, albeit they don't willing to change.but they have to, in order to survive in this brutal world. things seemed easy, but actually don't. remember the time we used to talk jokes? gossiping, spying people, though it might be a small matter, but these are the things i remember till now. but now, taking a glance at you seems to be the hardest thing to do. =( i ain't trying to aggravate..but i feel like if i don't let this out, i'm going to die (not really),LOL.some of you might think this post is pointless. yep, it might be pointless, it is a crap, rubbish and whatever, i don't really care. i don't wanna disguise myself as a person you don't know. i wanna prove my personal existence in this world. i do exist in this world. i might be a tiny person, but at least i'm real.being able to live in this world is the most wonderful gift i ever had. all of us have tomorrow, and plus it will never be out of stock. as long as you have it, you'll have the chance to proof yourself. =D the post end here.bye..^^

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i don't know what should i put for the title.so i just put it as '...' haha..let's talk about today,shall we? LOL, firstly, i was so anticipated.you know why? lol, because we can go back earlier..and as today no stay on, so i thought i could just lied at the sofa, and watch tv. but what i wished earlier has become bubbles. Teacher forced those who were in waja to attend the practice. or else. demerit 10.
i hesitated. should i go, or shouldn't? my mind was driving me crazy. but then i decided to go, for that 10 marks. haha, but i go there for taking the attendance only, then started to talk with the teachers (and gossiping also) LOL.it's drizzling that time.and it was fun too, hmm, but it started to rain heavily at 4. i stayed at the school for a while, to wait for the rain to stop. haha,that's all.uneventful ==

i am so full! ate too much just now..haha..i'm going to school tomorrow..which is a burden to me. but i must go. TT..i thought i could sleep for a longer time. TT haiz haiz haiz...luckily, i passed for my physics.i thought i would fail.haha..it was really lucky then. hmm..got nothing to blog anymore.will stop here.BB